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Nothing Left to Give

You’re asking for more?
Seriously?
As if I haven’t sacrificed enough already.
I’ve sold my eyes…
My my teeth, my nose, my ears and my lips.
My smile wasn’t worth much, but I got a little bit off that.
My flesh from my bones was priced too.
Everything’s got to go if you want to live an unfulfilled life.
All of what you work for has to be rid of by night.
My legs, arms and hands are taxed by the day and I’ve mortgaged my soul and heart. I have not much left to give.Not much left to live comfortably.
I’ve given everything I could give and… I wonder how I am going to live.
My body is out there sold to the highest bidder.
I’m not throwing in the towel for someday I hope to buy back what is rightfully mine.
Peace.
The air that I breathe, I pay for it.
I say, sit down.
I say, stand up.
I said, the air that I breathe, the space I occupy around me, the things that I look at all cost me.
My wallet is empty and I’m broke.
Even what I say, the words that I spoke, that comes at a high dollar cost.
Even at the finish line I have not lost.
Posting an ad on Craigslist to sell what is left.
I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m doing my best.
It’s all such a mess.
I have nothing else to hand out, nothing else to stick on a price tag.
You have all my money in that dirty, ripped trash bag.
I would sell my throat to you, but that was sold to the highest bidder, for 5$.
I sold my name.
I even sold the shame and the guilt.
I sold everything I own, everything I’ve built.
I even put a cheap price the warmest quilt.
I own only what I need to survive.
I own only what I need to stay alive.
How can the world ask me for more when I don’t have anything?
I put a second mortgage on my heart and my soul.
Sshhhh, don’t tell the first person or I might have to pay a fee with every penalty you can think of.
I am on the brink of… Insanity.
I’ve lost all I’ve had of me.
Please don’t tell, that loan shark will certainly be mad at me.
The mob is after me for what I cannot give.
They are after me for what I borrowed just to live.
A life that holds only struggle and no money.
I have given all that I could give.
I handed out all that I am.
I am less of a man.
I did what I can to survive.
I did everything I did just to stay alive.

 

© Donovan G. Ward

Poetry

Donovan Ward from CWP View All →

I am attending college online with Grand Canyon University (GCU) for an English Teaching degree for Secondary Education. The first question I was asked when I made the decision to embark on this journey to be a teacher was, "Why do you want to be a teacher?" My response: "It is not for the money." Regardless, I am looking forward to being a teacher and am on this blog as part of a college course. I have written (never published) books and poetry of all kinds and have a love for writing in general. I have never done a blog before so we will see how this goes. Let's do this!

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